A little nutty. Entirely fictional. No real banking here ↗

Mortgages · Products · FROM THE ACORNBANK FOREST

Treehouse Mortgage — Imaginary Fees and Other Chestnuts

A made-up mortgage with a two-year introductory fixed rate. The repayment table includes the assumed rate change after month 24, so the attractive opening payment is not mistaken for a 25-year guarantee.

A treehouse in a leafy oak.
A fictional bank, a real sense of humour. All people, places, products and figures are invented. No real banking or financial advice. About this demo.

Demo rate card4.59% fixed for 2 years; then 6.49% assumed variable rate

The pound values and percentages on this page are invented AcornBank product terms, chosen for a realistic bank-style example. They are not current market offers, an invitation to deposit or invest money or a forecast of what a real bank will pay.

Product detailDemo terms
Account typeRepayment mortgage
Rate, reward or charge4.59% fixed for 2 years; then 6.49% assumed variable rate
Illustrative advance£25,000.00 to £500,000.00
AccessMonthly capital-and-interest repayments over 25 years in the illustration
Eligibility in the scenarioAn adult story applicant with a deposit of at least 20% and assumed affordability
Fees£999.00 arrangement fee, paid upfront
CurrencyGBP (£), used solely for fictional calculations

Fees and charges

ChargeModel treatment
Opening / arrangement£999.00 upfront
Monthly account fee£0.00
Interest on borrowing4.59% fixed for 2 years; then 6.49% assumed variable rate
Early accessSee access terms
Real amount payable to AcornBank£0.00 — this is a fictional demo, not a service

Treehouse Mortgage is repayment mortgage in the Mortgages range, used for buying a fictional treehouse. Its live rate card, summary and worked tables sit above this text and update whenever the product record changes.

Keep the cost in the same picture as the rate

A fee can reduce the benefit of interest, growth or cashback, and borrowing interest can exceed a reward. The table distinguishes ongoing charges from an upfront fee. Do not subtract a fee twice: the mortgage total already includes its arrangement fee, while its yearly repayment rows contain repayments only.

The worked examples show the product-specific calculations and timing assumptions in full.

Other mortgage terms in the story

There are no overpayments in the repayment table. The separate early-repayment illustration would charge 2% of capital repaid early during months 1–12, 1% during months 13–24 and zero after that; those charges are excluded from the scheduled-payment total. The £999 fee is paid upfront rather than added to the advance. This is not a loan offer, affordability decision or property valuation.

See the whole Mortgages range or compare every product on the rates page.

What the example does not promise

All figures are invented and shown to make the demo useful to read and crawl. No money is held, no application is available, and no deposit-protection, regulatory or tax-wrapper status is claimed. Calculations do not account for personal tax, inflation or unstated changes in rates. The fictional bank manager can guarantee only that the next paragraph contains no real acorns.

Related reading


AcornBank: entirely fictional banking, exceptionally committed squirrels.