A little nutty. Entirely fictional. No real banking here ↗

Current accounts · Products · FROM THE ACORNBANK FOREST

Branch Out Business — Which Squirrels Can Join?

A separate ledger for invoices, stock and the question of whether eaten inventory counts as a sale. The model charges £6 a month and pays no interest, so the cost of a quiet trading year stays visible.

A bank card resting on a leaf ledger.
A fictional bank, a real sense of humour. All people, places, products and figures are invented. No real banking or financial advice. About this demo.

Demo rate card0.00% credit interest; £6.00 monthly account fee

The pound values and percentages on this page are invented AcornBank product terms, chosen for a realistic bank-style example. They are not current market offers, an invitation to deposit or invest money or a forecast of what a real bank will pay.

Product detailDemo terms
Account typeBusiness current account
Rate, reward or charge0.00% credit interest; £6.00 monthly account fee
Opening / maximum balance£0.00 to £250,000.00
AccessRoutine business payment scenarios; no real transfers or merchant services
Eligibility in the scenarioA fictional sole trader or small woodland business with an adult operator
Fees£6.00 per month
CurrencyGBP (£), used solely for fictional calculations

A quiet year: what does the account cost?

Starting balanceAnnual interest12 monthly feesClosing balance
£1,000.00£0.00£72.00£928.00
£5,000.00£0.00£72.00£4,928.00
£10,000.00£0.00£72.00£9,928.00

Assumptions: no incoming or outgoing payments, no borrowing, twelve monthly account fees and no interest. This is an account-cost illustration, not a savings-return table. A payment to another account moves money; it does not create a return. The balance is assumed large enough to cover every fee.

Branch Out Business is business current account in the Current accounts range, used for separating a woodland stall’s takings from personal spending. Its live rate card, summary and worked tables sit above this text and update whenever the product record changes.

Who fits the fictional example?

A fictional sole trader or small woodland business with an adult operator. These are character-selection rules for the demo, not a real eligibility assessment. The scenario assumes the opening amount or limit fits the product range and that any required guardian, notice period or repayment plan is in place. A customer story is not evidence that a real application would be accepted.

See the whole Current accounts range or compare every product on the rates page.

What the example does not promise

All figures are invented and shown to make the demo useful to read and crawl. No money is held, no application is available, and no deposit-protection, regulatory or tax-wrapper status is claimed. Calculations do not account for personal tax, inflation or unstated changes in rates. The fictional bank manager can guarantee only that the next paragraph contains no real acorns.

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AcornBank: entirely fictional banking, exceptionally committed squirrels.